Decisions, Decisions...

Sigh - so much to do and so little money! Yes, "Elizabeth" moved back to Miami and found a wonderful job where she doesn't have to choose between feeding herself or feeding her dog but "Nawar" wants to spend all of "Elizabeth's" money and there's a rift growing between the two personalities. Do I prefer to eat daily, purchase gasoline to take me to and from work so I can make a living and ensure that I have utilities and a roof over my head or do I want to buy costumes that make me drool, jet set to far-off lands to engross myself in culture and take workshops from every dancer whom I aspire to be like? Decisions!! Sadly, my lucky numbers have been no luck at all since as I Iook around, I'm not swimming in a pile of money so I GUESS Nawar will have to make a few sacrifices and cut Elizabeth some slack.

Remember being a child at the grocery store with your mom or your dad, putting any and everything within arm's reach into the shopping cart? After getting scolded, mom or dad felt an ounce of pity and told you that you could have just one item of your choice. Damn! Bubblicious or Dunk-a-roos? This exact emotion has plagued me for the past few weeks because workshop after workshop taught by dancers I admire are surfacing like there's no tomorrow and logically, I can't attend them all... but I want to....

To give you an idea of what I am currently facing:

Morocco
Bozenka
Tamalyn Dallal
Nourhan Sharif
Ansuya
Jillina
Asmahan
Karim Nagi
Amar Gamal

This is just September and October and the list goes on! Add to that various performance and fashion shows, costumes, eye lashes, photo shoots, air tickets and regular weekly classes and you're living the American Dream.... living "the life" on the surface but racking up crazy debt and crying on the inside every time the credit card bill arrives. Sidebar - I don't own any credit cards. If I don't have the money for something, I don't need it! End Sidebar.


Photo courtesy of media.findinghomesforyou.com

Workshops are important tools for any dancer, from beginner to career professional. I have danced since I was a child; I've been a member of all sorts groups, troupes and entities that seemed more cult-like than anything, and I have also been a leader. I've never seen or felt the sense of community, respect and appreciation for a dance form as I've seen for belly dance and Middle Eastern dance forms in general. I currently study with someone whom, after a few classes, I am in complete and utter awe of. The other night she began teaching a form of dance that I'd never heard of [but am unequivocally in love with because hot damn, it's beautiful!] and in an instant, at another dancer's request, she spit out its history. Like other instructors, she encourages growth through learning from others. She said something to me the other day on the phone and she's right; when you walk out of a workshop you have a dance growth spurt. Learning from masters seems to automatically make you a better dancer, spiritually and technically. I'm fortunate to get to learn from someone who travels the world and has such a broad dance vocabulary so every class feels like a workshop! The feeling that I get when entering and leaving her class is the sense that takes over me when I see that someone I've belly stalked (I'll be the first to admit that I do this - no shame) will be teaching a workshop in a city near me. It's immeasurable. I turn into a kid all over again but this time, mom and dad aren't around to tell me I can only select one item so I put everything within arm's reach into the shopping cart and for a few months, Marshmallow and I live on breadless PB&J sandwiches and Goldfish crackers. How can I possibly be expected to choose?



Photo courtesy of mccuecorp.com

For the workshops that will be taking place within the next two months, I may try a series of ideas: flipping a coin, picking names from a hat, waiting until the last minute and attending those that haven't sold out.... I guess I don't have to attend all three shows at the Miami Belly Dance Convention... Sigh, life isn't fair.

*Animal Rights activists and dog lovers, Marshmallow does not go hungry! :)

~Nawar